Morning Wood – Sep 20 2008 by Dani

Tags -- Laughs, Liz

This morning Liz got her own morning wood.

Her father had carved her some morning wood. When Lisa put it down in front of Liz it looked like a big cock covered by a cloth.

Liz was not quite sure what to do so she told Lisa she did not think it would fit. Lisa laughed and told her it was not meant to fit.

She lifted the cloth and peaked underneath then she giggled and lifted the cloth completely off.

There is a flower that grows near the river in the wild. It is called the morning wood because when it blooms its petals look like wood bark and are black.

They also spread out to be 6 or more inches wide.

Liz’s morning wood did exactly that –when she lifted the cloth her morning wood spread open into several petals – of course they were made out of a very dark wood.

The detail was amazing and each petal was completely different. Stubby had made it look like a few of the petals had morning dew on them.

Liz asked Lisa if the real thing had morning dew. Lisa asked which real thing – Liz said real morning wood. Lisa told her maybe they better go check.

Lisa headed out the deck door and Liz headed upstairs. Lisa asked where she was going and Liz said to check for morning dew. Lisa asked where and Liz said either Captain or her dad.

Lisa shook her head and sat down. Liz brought her some hot toddy and gave her a hug.

Captain came in and Liz hurriedly covered her ‘wood’ back up. She asked Captain if he wanted to see her morning wood. He laughed and dared her – Liz pulled the cover off and her morning wood spread wide.

Captain told everyone to look – Liz’s morning wood was ejaculating.

Liz was perfect: “What’s ejaculating Capt?” He told her the best thing that ever happens to him and he walked into the kitchen.

Someone had finally gotten the upper hand. We all watched Liz turn very bright red. Captain came back through and said that his ejaculation lasted longer then hers and his spread out at least eight inches.

Mom told him to be nice – he asked her if he was lying and Liz wanted to know how she would know. Pops immediately said he told Captain.

Pops and Captain left in a hurry.

Oops – we have to be careful.