On Wednesday my friends played a trick on me – a terrible trick – but it would have been great IF it had gone off as planned. In the end I got great payback but I am still exhausted by the unintended results.
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Briefly, Jeni went to the doctor for pregnancy tests. She got a call later that afternoon while I was at lunch with Annie that it was too soon to run the test.
Cindy, Debby and Jeni all went to town that afternoon to meet the classmates and happened to see Annie. They talked and Annie convinced them it was a perfect time to play a trick on me.
On Wednesday morning Jeni told me she could not take a lab test but still wanted to know so she went and bought several pregnancy tests.
She asked me to show her how to use them – I found it odd as I have never had occasion to use one – but I put it down to nerves.
We went in the bathroom and I peed on the test and she laughed very nervously. She asked me something about the Internet and we went back to my computer.
She remembered the tests and came out holding the tests. I saw the positive sign and hugged her congratulating her when she pushed me back and asked which test was mine, left or right. When I looked I told her she mixed them up. No she was sure. She told me she would get Lisa.
I grabbed another test and went to the bathroom off my bedroom and peed on my hand again.
Lisa came in asking if I was OK saying she wanted me to talk to Pops – he was sick in bed with a cold. I talked to him for a few minutes and agreed with Lisa he just needed more rest.
I checked the test in my bathroom, grabbed my keys and fanny pack and went out the deck door walking around the cabin to my car and left.
I didn’t want to talk to anyone. I headed for the big house but drove right past – I did not want to be found – after several calls and text messages, all of which I ignored I turned off my phone.
About thirty miles later I turned off the Interstate and traveled to a little town with a brand new hotel next to a small cafe.
I parked in the back of the lot between two semis – I do not know why – and checked in with no luggage.
I tried to eat lunch, went to Wally world for supplies and two sweat pant outfits and laid in bed for the next 24 hours. I was devastated. How had my IUD let me down? What had gone wrong? What would happen to school? What would the teens think?
I slept very little and woke up cramping badly. I took a run wishing I had a sports bra – it has been a long time since I let the twins out.
Read the post right before this one – it’ll explain the twins and my little exhibition.
When I got back from my jog I took a hot bath and showered.
I went next door for lunch and ate like a pig. I got back to the room trying to decide what I was going to do. I had to pee and when I wiped I noticed something but just went to the lobby for supplies and then crawled back in bed and might have cried for a while.
I ate again at supper like a pig then went back to bed but had terrible nightmares. When I woke up I changed my pad and wished I had a pair of panties or a thong - then it hit me.
How could I be pregnant IF I was bleeding. Was this a bad sign. Then I did some calculations and after a little bit I called the girls about every name I could think of. What a dirty fucking trick.
I grabbed my crap, paid my bill and drove to MickyDs for some comfort food and saw the assholes from the day before (read the previous post). As I started to drive out I rolled the window down and called them fucking losers and left in a hurry.
They followed me. When they pulled up next to me I showed them my third item and floored my Mustang. It was no contest and I snacked on shitty chicken parts, chewed on a piece of rawhide and sucked down a chocolate shake with something that sort of tasted like apples for dessert. The shake was the best part – and the sweet and sour sauce.
I pulled my phone out and texted Lisa telling her I was on the way. I did not check any of the messages – I knew what they said. I turned the phone back off.
When I walked in the front door, Annie, Debby, Cindy, BBs, Jeni, the classmates and Lisa were all there with frightened looks.
Moms, who had got home early that morning, and Pops were in back of them with concerned but loving looks. The teens were behind them with questioning looks on their faces.
Annie started to talk but I held my finger up and grabbed my phone pretending to answer it. I paused for just the right amount of time then said yes doctor, thanks doctor and closed my phone and my eyes,
BBs asked what was wrong. I said the doctor had just confirmed it….and I paused again for dramatic effect, cursed and said I was NOT having a baby.
Annie said, “Confirmed?” I shook my head yes then said again, “But I am not having a baby. Not now!”
The look of shock on everyone’s faces was wonderful – perfect – exactly what I was looking for.
The girls in front all gathered around to give me hugs and congratulations. None of them could see my face so I winked at Pops and Moms then held a finger to my mouth.
They all started to laugh then Pops caught them and Moms came forward acting so proud to finally become grandparents. They were absolutely perfect.
Pops took the teens outside to explain. They all came running back in excited and hugging and kissing me and asking what it felt like. When Liz hugged me she whispered “What a payback” and squeezed me harder.
She let go and called to GrandPops asking about an early lunch since the party was starting early. Party? Then it dawned on me why everyone was here – it was the annual Halloween party. I had forgotten all about Halloween.
I told the gathering thanks for everything but I was NOT having a baby now – it was the truth but the traitors, as I thought of them, thought I meant I was aborting the pregnancy. I did nothing to indicate otherwise – I was telling the truth – I was NOT having a baby.
I told them all I had not slept well, I needed a nap. Moms came to my room with me and we had to cover our faces with pillows to prevent our laughter from being heard. Liz came in and covered her face.
She told us the other adults were going nuts and had no idea what to do or say. They were in total shock.
All of us girls – Annie, BBs, Jeni, Cindy, Lisa, the classmates, Momtoo and Debby were all mistakes. I found out today that Liz was a mistake too. We were all unplanned pregnancies. We were a sisterhood and had all agreed we would never give up a baby unless our health was in jeopardy.
They could not understand how I could not have the baby.
I told Moms what I wanted to be for Halloween and Liz said she had the perfect prop.
I went to sleep giving orders to wake me in time for the costume parade.
At four Liz woke me up rubbing my back, She asked if I wanted to sleep longer and I stretched saying I felt great – the nightmares were gone.
I took quick shower and came out to find Annie and BBs waiting for me. I looked straight at Annie and told her I did not want to talk or see her right now.
She left almost in tears. BBs started to say something but I stopped her and told her the real facts. She laughed until she cried. Liz came back with our costumes and we helped each other get dressed.
She was going as a whore – her skirt was so short it hid nothing, She had a bright orange thong on over flesh colored tights that did very little to hide her butt or her pussy lips. Her bright orange bra barely contained her beautiful tits. She looked so good.
I was a pregnant lady that looked like hell. I wore a shapeless dress and a bra that was at least fours sizes too big but one of the Moms had sewn padding into the cups making it look like I had tits the size of watermelons.
I had a fake pregnancy stomach that Liz said the classmates supplied – between my legs I put a rag doll that looked like it was from the Chucky movies. It was grotesque. When I squatted it fell out to the floor complete with a fake umbilical cord.
I was amazed. Liz said it was perfect as she sprayed hair spray over my messed up hair. I looked perfect.
Then Pops knocked on the door and said the parade was starting. Liz and I walked out to the balcony and watched as one by one each person walked down the stairs, around the great room and back upstairs.
Stubby was acting as the master of ceremonies dresses as a pirate. He had pulled his peg leg out of storage and had a bloody hook on his left hand and a sword on his belt.
When I reached the middle of the great room I squatted and the ‘baby’ popped out. I heard the older girls scream but all the people in the know laughed hard. They all got terrible looks from the ‘traitors’.
Liz walked down shaking her ass and bent over several times showing her ass and she stuck a hand in her bra pulling her tits back into the cups and squishing them together damn near showing them all. All the guys got turned on but Stubby was disgusted and let it show.
Liz stuck her tongue out at him them pretended to flash her tits at him.
Then the party started. I was asked several times to ‘birth’ the baby and each time Annie was visibly upset. The classmates were upset their contribution was being used the way it was but they never approached me.
I drank so much that the ‘traitors’ told me several times I would hurt the baby. I always answered ‘good’ and drained my drink.
I was feeling no pain and went to the downstairs bathroom to pee and to change my pad.
About ten minutes later Cindy popped out of the bathroom and went to each of the traitors. Liz wondered what she was up to.
Then I was summoned to the middle of the great room by a loud yell. Annie was there and looked pissed. I laughed and walked up to her.
She looked me in the eye then grabbed my crotch and called me about ten names. The people in the know were all laughing hard. The traitors looked like they had been kicked in the face.
I asked them how they liked my payback. Then I told the story with them filling in their parts.
Annie had hatched the idea and the girls all thought it would be great. Lisa planned it. Bitch.
After Jeni and I peed on the tests, Debby snuck in and peed on another replacing mine. Jeni brought out the results tricking me.
Lisa wondered if I would be so shocked I would test again so Cindy watched from the third floor and when I disappeared into my room she signaled Lisa who took me to see Pops.
Cindy snuck into my bathroom and peed on another test and left it for me.
What Lisa had not expected was me leaving like I did. It completely screwed up their trick and they felt so bad.
The called everyone and they looked for me Wednesday and Thursday until finally Lisa confided in Pops what they had done.
He made a call to the credit card company but when he called the hotel I had already checked out then Lisa got my text a few minutes later.
The girls were all rehearsing their apologies when they heard my car. Everyone lined up and were ready to get their asses kicked once they confessed.
When I saw their faces an idea popped out of no where and I pretended to take the phone call. Everyone assumed the doctor had confirmed I was pregnant which totally screwed them up.
The traitors all thought the trick could be concealed and I would never know. But when I emphatically insisted I was not having a baby they misunderstood and their focus changed.
I told them all what a perfectly terrible trick it was and they all looked guilty.
I told them of noticing blood and buying pads from a fucking machine in front of a couple of hot guys.
I spoke of crying myself to sleep and not realizing until the next morning I could not be pregnant if I was bleeding and everything made since.
I told them all the names I had called them in that little bathroom in that lonely hotel room that only had five channels on the TV and no computers. They all looked ashamed.
Then I told them the next time we could not leave the victim alone.
When they realized I had forgiven them and even praised the trick the party really began.
I noticed Liz and Mr. Nerd were missing. I found them on the second floor in a dark corner pawing each other like whore and john.
I told Mr. Nerd to let go of that ass and tit but Liz told me to be quiet – she was 18. And she went back to rubbing Mr. Nerd’s hard-on.
I went to the first bedroom, Annie’s, grabbed a box of condoms and handed them to Mr. Nerd. I told him to have Liz how him how she could put them on with her mouth.
As I was walking away I told him he would have much more fun if he stuck his hands inside her clothes.
As my bedroom door was closing I heard a smack and Liz telling Mr. Nerd he had to ask first.
I decided Liz and I needed to have a long talk.
And that is where I’ve been. I wish it on no one.
Thankfully it all turned out great.
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